Huzzah

I've not be the worlds greatest blogger nor do I really care to be at this point. But this I will say it's good to hear that everyone is doing well. Congratulations to Amy Cornett for finishing her Masters Degree! Also to hear what's going down with Emily and Hugh loving it. And seeing Miss Paige growing up so much it's awesome. As for me thing are just normal just struggling through life and making ends met, work is now going to four ten's! which is amazing this will open my weekends up and allow more time with the Fams. Plus I'm also up for two great positions Journeymen and Crew Chief on Swings. This wasn't something that was planned but after going through a pretty rough trail in my life it's so great that Heavenly Father will still pour our his spirit and blessings to sinners like myself. Remember I love each of your I might not show it in normal fashion but, you are all dear to my heart. Thanks for every ones love. Take care One love.

Blessings

This week as been kinda crazy in the sense that I've had to take the bus into work, while Raylyn Wrestles and manages Four children. From where I live it's exactly 13.5 miles into work so if I where to walk into work it would take me roughly 1.2 hrs to complete. I kept getting a gut feeling that I missed the bus and would have walk in, but everytime I started to walk, there was a feeling for me to stop and go back to the original stop. Not after I get back two minutes later a old neighbor of mine who has long last moved into another apartment complex come onto the main road, Redwood and noticed me waiting at the bus stop. He pulled over and offered me a ride into work! I thinking this is a answer to prayers for sure. It did turn out I did miss the bus by five minutes and wouldn't have made into work on time, if I didn't listen to the promptings of the spirit.

Things will be better

I'm really sorry for not writing more positive things other than my issues at hand, but I promise from here on out there will be more happiness sprinkled with sunshine and a little lollipops.

Other Issues

I would really love to share some of the problems in which I'm suffering from but do to the nature of the content which would be written I'll forgo saying more. Other than my life is Hell at this point and feels like my mind is going a mile a minute, and frankly it truly feels like no one out there knows what's happening to me in the inside.

Truth and other issues

I'm openly admitting online to my readers and those who do fall upon this blog. I'm a Lier,Manipulator,Cheater,Etc. There isn't anyone to blame but myself, I'm not perfect nor well I ever be. But the last couple weeks has really taught me is that everyone else is fine but me and there are some serious underlining issues in my life that need addressing or they can destroy my entire life.
I don't feel that I can really pinpoint my issues other than it's been me who hasn't lived up to my full expectations.
In so many ways it's hard to really accept the fact there have been several chances to change my outcome and never once have I really fully grabbed it and took full control.
Anyway my thoughts are going a mile a minute so with that said signing off for now. And thanks to my followers, and readers.
Chow

Addiction Recovery Program

I know that there are some of you who might not like I'm writing this or speaking of it in general. But I it's important to not hide what as been done, I have some issues with trust and trusting others and with Technology. Which lead to my Wife catching me instead of me coming forward and doing the right thing but doing it myself. Now that's been said my Bishop is now having me Taking Addiction Recovery Classes. Last night was my first meeting of Twelve. It was really odd to say the least because for one it felt as thought I spent back in time when someone say anything everyone else would say "Here,here". My first thought was holy crap what did the bishop put me in! I thought for the second someone was going to say Huzzah or pep pep.
Needless to say it was a nice meeting and that the classes will help out in the recovery process, I don't plan on repeating everything one says or does still doesn't feel comfortable for a church setting.
Again please feel comments or anything to help me out or whatevers. Take care and hope to hear from many of you.
Also consider giving me any advice on being a better parent.

ADHD

My whole life resolves around this topic! I for one hate it with a absolute passion, people judge you and lower their thoughts on what you can do solely upon a Learning Disability. My entire life has been trying to find ways to overcome this and be a better person. Last night was yet another testament when my Crew Chef basically said to another supervisor that we aren't doing overtime because Mark doesn't know how to set up the Machine. I have notes Journal entry's etc to prove that it may take a little longer to set up but at least it will be done correctly. It really made me sad because this isn't the First time where my Disability has worried my chances in moving forward.
When people don't understand how other learn or operate it' hard to fit in when they want everyone else to do it there way. This whole thing upset me so much that I couldn't fall asleep so instead to relax my mind and body a good run was needed at three in the morning. Needless without any company to talk it give me a moment to reflect on the events that accord that night. In so crazy way what my crew chef said made some sense in that I need to step up more and take charge in my life and actually learn it myself rather than relying on others to show me.
This whole experience has shown me that no one else will do it for you but yourself